Every so often I have ridiculous conversations with people on London Underground. Today was one of those days…
Ok, so after finally managing to squeeze onto a rush hour train, I felt someone behind me pushing my arm.
I turned around to see a girl that looked like Missy Elliott (which is ironic because I shared Missy Elliott’s new video on Facebook yesterday), and she’s pushing me.
With both hands.
Me: (taking off my headphones and shrugging her off) What are you DOING?
Attitude Girl: You’re standing too close! Move!
Me: Are you crazy?! You just pushed your way onto a rammed train, how is it my fault that there isn’t enough room?
Attitude Girl: Is it your train?
Me: (talking slowly) No, it’s not my train, but it is my arm. Just say ‘excuse me’ instead of pushing.
Attitude Girl: I need to get to work.
Me: Oh, that’s funny, the rest of us are all going cinema…
Attitude Girl: Just move man.
Me: (putting headphones back on) Alright, whatever, you keep talking I’m not listening.
Attitude Girl: (keeps talking but I can’t hear cos of the headphones)
Me: (taking headphones off) Seriously, you’re arguing with yourself here. I’m done with this conversation. (put my headphones back on)
Attitude Girl: (keeps talking for a few seconds then stops when she realises I’m genuinely not listening)
The only consolation? I got a few laughs from the ‘cinema’ line.
(Hey, I take laughs where I can get ’em…)